"Anheuser-Busch announced they are coming out with low-carb beer called "Ultra" which is aimed at the diet-conscious beer drinker. Diet-conscious beer drinker...aren't those called women?"
--Jay Leno

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I don't buy temporary insanity as a murder defense. Because people kill people. That's and animal instinct. I think breaking into someone's home and ironing all their clothes is temporary insanity.

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"The last time somebody said, 'I find I can write much better with a word processor.', I replied, 'They used to say the same thing about drugs.'"
--Roy Blount Jr.