In an email from my friend Dave. Love you!!! *MUAH*

If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he's the guy who
once said: "I woke up one morning and all of my stuff had been stolen and
replaced by exact duplicates."

Here are some more of his gems:

* I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
* Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back.
* Half the people you know are below average.
* 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
* 42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
* A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
* A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
* If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.
* The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
* I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
* OK, so what's the speed of dark?
* How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
* If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
* Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
* When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
* Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
* Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
* I intend to live forever - so far, so good.
* If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
* Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
* What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
* My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn
louder."
* Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
* If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
* A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
* Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
* To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
* The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
* The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST
* Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film

My gf Cindy is sooooo lucky! She got to see Vladimir Konstantinov! In her words:

"He looked really good too. Still using the walker. He was all by himself, noone with him, or so it seemed. There were 3 people in the elevator, me, my aunt, & him. He kept on looking at us & I knew who he was IMMEDIATELY. He is one BIG dude man. It was SOOOO cool. It was at Motor City Casino, I was there with my Aunt & my Father.

I am sooooo jealous :p~

Born today, you are a true original -- destined to do things in a manner that is virtually inimitable, though widely admired. It will lead you directly to the threshold of remarkable success. You tend to be just a little too concerned with what others are thinking about you; this separates you from many others who share your drive and self-confidence. There are times when you alter your course because you feel you are upsetting someone around you. This is unnecessary; you must always do what is right for you.

You can be aggressive, even intrusive, at times -- but you always mean well. On the other hand, you have the capacity for great introspection, and can be quiet, thoughtful and even timid at times. This paradox fascinates those who know you well.

News Story!

Local Teacher Accused Of Raping Student
Police Say DNA Evidence Links Man To Crime

POSTED: 7:09 p.m. EST October 27, 2003
UPDATED: 9:20 p.m. EST October 27, 2003

Some local residents are shocked to find a popular teacher and soccer coach has been arrested for allegedly raping a student, Local 4 reported.
Video

Paul Ivity, 31, a physical education teacher and coach of the junior varsity girls and boys soccer teams at Gerisch Middle School in Southgate, was taken into custody Monday.

Police say a 15-year-old girl -- a player on the girl's soccer team -- had apparently been drinking at Ivity's home in August when he took advantage of her.

The teen was reportedly too drunk to resist, but she later went to the hospital to be treated, according to police.

School officials and students were shocked to hear of the allegations against Ivity (pictured, left), who, according to one girl was everyone's favorite teacher, Local 4 reported.

Southgate schools Superintendent Dave Peden says Ivity has been suspended.

"In all my dealings with him, I never had any problems with him. I'm just shocked," said Peden.

Police say they have DNA evidence linking Ivity to the alleged crime. Detectives are urging any other possible victims to come forward, the station reported.

"This young lady came forward and that alone is a very courageous act," said Chief Larry Hall of the Southgate Police Department.

Ivity, who's reportedly a married man, faces four counts of first-degree rape, which carries a maximum penalty of life in prison.

Ivity's bond has been set at $10,000. If he's released, a judge has ordered he stay away from the school.


OMG! I went to school with this guy!!!! HE was about the quietest guy i knew! And nice! I'm in shock! I can't even belive! Thanks Joel for letting me in on this. I have it google alert now so if and when anything happens I'll be let know immediately!