Sometimes ....

Sometimes I totally feel like I'm 16 (or so) again. 

Myspace and Facebook are such a blessing, but they are also a curse. Cuz I'm starting to feel like I'm not part of the cool kids again. And at 36 I shouldn't have these emotions running thru my head and my heart. But I do. And altho i can usually deal with it, sometimes it's kind of overwhelming.

It's really amazing to see everything my friends have done in the almost 20 years(!) since high school. And altho I'm so happy with my life right now, part of me gets sad thinking I totally was one of those people that peaked in high school.

I don't say this to make people feel sorry for me or anything. This is just how I feel.

Things really came to a head when i visited an old friend a couple weeks back. She's in such a great place right now and working towards her PhD. The other friend who was with me is working towards taking his MCat and going to Med School. And me? I only had 1 year of college, I don't work outside the home, and I don't even have a driver's license.

And did i mention I have crappy teeth and have gained way too much weight since we left high school?

I felt this way around the 10 year reunion too. I almost didn't go cuz I knew I was going to run into people who were doing so much better than I. At that time Iwas living in the same town we graduated from and hosting karaoke.

Anyway, I'm sure I'll get over this hump. But right now I'm just feeling like I wasted my life and it's not a good feeling. And oh yea! I'm totally not one of the cool kids.

yay for google!!!!

so i randomly decided to try and google an old friend of mine from my college years. 

He was a DJ on a local radio station and we met cuz I called him one night when i was in college asking about an alternate version of the song "Voices That Care" - my roommate didn't believe me there was more than 1 version. He got excited cuz he was the only one that played it (so i must have been listening to him on the overnight) and he played it for me (I still prefer that version to the one that was overplayed on the radio)

That began alot of me calling him and chatting during his downtime - mostly at night at first when I was awake and no one else was - I called on the weekends and did those cheesy "i just LOVE xxxFM" promos for him - We were supposed to meet up before I went back home to Michigan but we never did. We did exchange addresses tho and kept in touch thru snail mail. And the occassional fax when we were both bored at work. I'm pretty sure if i looked hard enough I could find most of those. (remember this is pre interwebz for us - faxes and snail mail were pretty much all we had)

Anyway, when my life got crazy and I lost touch with pretty much everyone, I lost touch with him. It made me so sad. Every once in awhile I would try to find him via the interwebz to no avail.

But fast forward to today when I punched his name into my google search engine page with the qualifier "DJ" and up popped a link to a radio station with a picture that looked alot like the picture I had of him - only he was a little older. So i crossed my fingers and used the "email xxx" link to contact him - and shortly thereafter I received a reply that it indeed was my long lost friend!!!!!

I'm still in shock! I always wondered what happened to him! 

So he's on the air tomorrow afternoon and I'm totally gonna spend that time listening to him and going into a reminiscent fog i'm sure.

*sigh*

I Couldn't Do Worse

An Open Letter to William Clay Ford Sr.

Dear Sir,

It has come to my attention that you are in the market for a new coach for your football team, The Detroit Lions. Well, search no more! I offically throw my hat into the ring. And I am confident that you will agree that I can help your team return to the grandness it once was.

Now, you may be thinking "But you have no prior experience!" 

To that I say to you : Does it really matter?

In 2008 your Detroit Lions went 0 - 16 under a coach that had almost as much experience in coaching football as I've had years on this planet. His 10 years under Tony Dungy as Defensive Line Coach combined with his 23 years in the college circuit did nothing in terms of bringing success to the Detroit Lions.

As a matter of fact the coaching records of the Detroit Lions in recent years as been pretty darn abyssmal. You have to go back to 2000 before you find a season where they went over .500 ... 1999 before we're in any kind of a playoff game ... and 1991 to find us in a Conference Championship game! As a Lions fan it's quite disheartening. I'm sure as an owner it is as well.  I mean, we've only been in the playoffs a handfull of time since you purchased the team in 1964. And I'm sure you're tired of hearing about our last blaze of glory back in 1957.

But I digress.

I'm not here to knock your choices for this team, or to beat anyone up for the horrid seasons we have suffered through. 

No. I am here to share that I have a vision - a vision that includes winning. A vision that includes bringing pride back to the city of Detroit. A vision that includes, most importantly, professional cheerleaders

I'm already working on assembling a coaching staff.

Taking a page from the Marinelli handbook, I am going to appoint my husband as our Defensive Coordinator. He already has quite a gameplan to rebuild us, including concentrating some of our 2009 draft picks on drafting a bigger, faster and stronger Defensive Line either through drafting or trading up. We're looking at a line more congruent with the Baltimore Ravens, with leaders like Ray Lewis and Ed Reed. His top draft choice is currently Andre Smith, OT from Alabama. He in reminiscent of (to repeat myself) ray lewis and at 6'4" and 340 lbs he's a presence we need on that Defense. We need Quarterbacks to be afraid of us again, not looking forward to playing the Detroit Lions so they can rack up the best numbers in their careers.

I also have an Assistant Head Coach lined up. Let's call him Mr. X. Mr. X currently works in the local media field, so we should probably protect his identity for as long as possible. And since Mr. X already works in the local media, he can help re-establish a friendly rapport with local reporters, radio jockeys, and the like. He can help us heal the wounded relationship the Lions have suffered with the media these last few pathetic years. 

Mr. X shall also be in charge of hand-picking the professional cheerleaders that will cheer on and inspire The Detroit Lions and their many fans. Trust me, I'm sure it will be a very tough job. It's also added incentive for him to do well in his media role, as if he doesn't, his cheerleading privilidges could be suspended.

Mr. X currently wants to add a rider to his contract that he doesn't work Sundays. I've assured him that it should be fine as last season it didn't appear that many of the coaches showed up on Sundays either.

As you can see, my staff isn't fully flushed out yet. I have a few more people in mind for the remaining positions. Those may or may not include additional family members and friends. I'm picturing a longtime friend Dino as perhaps Defensive Line Coach, my brother, Bob, as Offensive  Coordinator, and my sister, Velisia, as Assistant Head Coach / Marketing Guru (yes - I want 2 Assistant Head Coaches.)

Marketing isn't something a head coach usually worries about, but with the debacle of the 2008 season I feel that it's something that should be addressed by coaching staff and players. it's vital to continue to make this franchise viable and worth spending the time and money to support and come see in person. This is why we also plan on working on the marketing aspect.

Picture this: 

• Meet and Greets with fans the day of the game
  
• More charity appearances complete with authenticated signings
• Lottieries for the chance to be Roary for a game
• giveaways of mini-helmets, blue Lions #1 fan fingers, et. al to the first 5,000 or so fans (much like the Tigers do)

and my personal favorite:

• Charity nights at local restaurants where the players (and select coaching staff of course) are the servers for the night! and all their tips go to a selected charity.

Lest you think I'm ignoring the offense, I have a plan for them as well.

First thing we need to do is get an efficient offensive line. As a fan and a Michigan native, I have a soft spot for Jeff Backus. he's a UofM boy for goodness sake! But he frankly isn't cutting it. Did you watch any of those New York Jets games this year? Favre had all day to throw that ball  during his games. Of course he was still Favre and had almost as many interceptions as he had touchdowns this year, but that wasn't the fault of his Offensive Line. And that's what we need. So that we don't have to worry so much about a mobile QB. We can concentrate on qualilty and accuracy for that position.

I don't have any plans to draft a QB in the next couple of years to start rebuilding again. Frankly it's not gonna be worth our time until we can get some other things under control. We need a new QB coach (Jim Harbaugh maybe?) who can work with the talent we have and also communicate better with our Offensive Coordinator in order to let him know what our QBs strong points and weaknesses are. We need to build an offense around what we have, instead of trying to force the talent we have into a box they aren't comfortable in, and one that obviously isn't working for us. Forcing a square peg into a round hole is what destroyed Joe Harrington (in my opinion) and we should never be allowed to do that again.

Instead, focus our Offense around the strengths of the starting QB we have (am i repeating myself? it's that important) and let's let Drew Stanton bloom in his own time on the sidelines. Then, when the time comes, he can become as effective as those we saw explode in 2008 (Matt Cassel, Matt Ryan and Aaron Rodgers to name a few)

And let's stop getting running back who are at the ends of their careers. Tatum Bell? Rudy Johnson? Really? I think we have a powerhouse combo in Kevin Smith and Calvin Johnson. Let's get a powerhouse runningback along the veins of Jerom Bettis to backup Smith and let's find someone to compliment Johnson better that Furrey or McDonald. I'm picturing a 1-2 punch like that of Moore and Morton back in the 90s. 

In closing, one of the most important reasons why you should consider me in bringing back new life to your organization is that I won't ask for millions per year for me and my staff. Set each of us up with a couple hundred thou a year and a new Ford vehicle and we'll be happy. Bonuses for winning games would also be nice. And an all expenses paid trip to Hawaii when we finally get back into the playoffs after so many years. Think of the money you'll save on us! And think of all the positive publicity when you hire a local woman - yes WOMAN! - to bring your Detroit Lions back to their glory days.

So, there you have it Mr. Ford. Take your time. Think it over. I'm sure you'll come to the right decision.

Sincerely,

Jazmyn B.

loyal Detroit Lions fan and potential future head coach in the NFL

Picture Bride and Kike Like Me (possible spoilers)

I watched 2 movies today that I've had on the DVR for awhile but just couldn't seem to get in the right mood to watch them. One of them I loved, the other one .... well ....

Picture Bride was amazing. I am madly in love with many things Japan. I think their language is gorgeous and their culture is fascinating. They are so grounded and yet so mystical at the same time.

This was my second introduction to the relationship of Japan and Hawaii (Hula Girls being the first - which i highly recommend as well) and it's definitely a relationship I'd like to read more about. Especially with the dichotomy of the fact that Japan blew up Hawaii in 1941)

Anyway, Picture Bride came out in 1994 and it's focus is a young Japanese city girl who falls in love with a Japanese man via letters and a picture and moves to Hawaii to marry him. Think arranged marriage meets mail order bride I guess. It deals with her struggles with this man who isn't everything she thought he would be and her struggle with the difference in culture and working (she is from the city and when she gets to Hawaii she's expected to work in the Sugar Cane fields - hard "country" work)

it really was an amazing movie and I had small tears in my eyes at the end. I loved the development of the characters in relation to each other as well as themselves. And even tho most of it is shot in the sugar cane fields, you just can't disguise the beauty of Hawaii. I really hope to go there someday. And the tiny sprinkling of spirituality and mysticism was just enough to make you think.

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Kike Like Me was completely different. It was about a young man's journey to see what it's like being jewish today. At least that's what the info synopsis said on the DVR.

Jamie Kastner is the filmmaker and the main character in this short 1 hour documentary. It starts off kinda neat. He claims the premise of the movie is based on Gregory Peck's movie "Gentleman's Agreement" from 1947 (which I've never seen but now I want to) in which Peck is a journalist who proclaims himself as Jewish in order to write a story about Anti-Semitism.

He starts out going to a Hasidic Jewish community in NYC where he's welcomed with open arms into their shul. from there he travels all over - London, Jerusalem, Paris, Berlin, Krakow and finally Auschwitz - all the while just feeling people out about how they feel about Jews and basically showing how anti-semitism is alive and well and abundant even among people who say they're tolerant.

But somewhere along the way the message gets confuzzled. He claims that it's based on how Peck claimed he was Jewish when anyone asked, but when he's asked by people whether he's Jewish, he responds with "Why do you want to know?" (Except when asked by the Hasidic Jews in the beginning - them he willingly states that he's Jewish with no defensive "why do you care?" attitude)

I don't want to ruin it for anyone who wants to see this documentary. And altho I don't give it a ringing endorsement, there are parts of it that are worth seeing.

Like the interaction he has with Pat Buchannon when he tries to interview him regarding his book and his feelings on Neo-Conservatives and the Jews.

Or the chat he has with a woman in London who states that her friends are all very anti-Israel and have told her "just because you had that holocaust doesn't give you the right to go in and kill all those poor Palistinians. It was 60 years ago. get over it"

It completely falls apart when he visits Krakow and then Auschwitz tho.

I can understand his frustration in Krakow. They're making a living on tourists coming to see the "jewish experience" there (courtesy of Schindler's List). They have Jewish restaurants (not actually run or owned by Jews) that serve Jewish food (not made by Jewish chefs) who have Klezmer trios serenading patrons with traditional jewish song (none of the musicians whom are Jewish).

But at Auschwitz he just loses it. He's inappropriate and condescending (asking whether they have t-shirts at a book store on the premises) and refuses to even check out the barracks or the gas chambers, stating that he doesn't need to go there and Auschwitz should just be bombed.

As someone who has visited a Holocaust museum (a very powerful one in Richmond, VA that brought me to tears) there is an absolute NEED to have a place like Auschwitz preserved for us and future generations. So that history is made more real and allows us to connect on a more personal level. It's one thing to read about those atrocities, but quite another to walk into the actual room that Anne Frank hid in as she tried to save her life. Or strolling the actual grounds that people walked on their way to their deaths. I can't imagine the power that would hold. But I do know that it's needed.

Not to convince those that don't believe such things happened. They'll never come out of their ignorant fog and actually see the truth. But for people who care and who can hopefully effect change so that such things don't happen again.

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So to sum up: Picture Bride - amazing. Kike like Me - had potential but ended up with me just wanting to slap the filmmaker in the face. But both are still worthwhile in their own ways.